


Cross the Rubicon

by awintersrose



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Parentage Headcanon, Angst and Romance, Founding of Konoha, Hashirama and Tobirama are not related, M/M, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 04:55:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17400428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awintersrose/pseuds/awintersrose
Summary: As the wedding procession of the First Hokage and his bride reaches its end, Senju Tobirama realizes his own relationship with Hashirama has approached a point of no return.





	Cross the Rubicon

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shipcat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shipcat/gifts).



> Based on a Tumblr ask prompt for @thatshipcat - HashiTobi; Deathless Prompt List; “I have moved the earth and water for you.”

The cavalcade stops before the Uzumaki shrine as the bridal procession meets its end, and Tobirama falls in step behind Hashirama and his intended, a perfect shadow, as effortless as the very first time he mirrored his brother’s footsteps. He ignores the grating sensation within his chest, for duty is duty, and nothing matters more than the continuity of the legacy of the village that owns their souls, and the clan that holds their blood.

His brother’s blood, at the least. There is a secret that died with Tobirama, Itama, and Kawarama’s mother, but no one speaks of such things when the Senju rally among their own. Blood is blood, and sons are sons, and when Senju Butsuma lost his first wife and took - some might say stole, but it matters not - another from among one of the northern tribes, it mattered little whether that woman already had a toddler close in age to his firstborn, so long as his first son was not at risk of losing his inheritance and pride of place. The Senju always needed to replenish the army with fighters and it was likely that a male child would die in battle anyway, thus his advisors suggested it was better to give the clan head’s son a protector than to abandon or expose the child in the forest.

Thus within his private household it was known that Tobirama would never inherit, and it was never revealed beyond closed doors that from the start the boy would find himself set apart as more of a retainer than a member of his own family. He would become Hashirama’s shadow, call him brother, and Butsuma father, but it would be made clear that those words would never mean the same things for him as they did for other children. His mother loved him, certainly, but the desires of women never weighed heavily on the minds of Senju men in those days.

Itama’s birth brought the bustle of joy, new excitement, and unity. The babe was a distraction for Butsuma and an affirmation that his line was strong, but the jubilation was short-lived when the war drums always beckoned onward. Hashirama and Tobirama began their schooling in martial arts and how to hold swords as soon as they could pick up wooden training blades, and their father was merciless. Then the following year, Tobirama’s mother died bearing Kawarama, and Butsuma grew even colder in his grief.

Late one autumn night, a five year old Hashirama intervened to save Tobirama’s life from the ire of his drunken father.

“I won’t ever let him hurt you again.” he promised, with a tearful smile and an outstretched hand, the common area of the house splintered and shot through with tree trunks the size of giants, at least to Tobirama’s eyes.

From that moment on, Tobirama swore he’d never leave Hashirama’s side.

Nevertheless, being raised as a Senju male meant peace was something only to be dreamt about. Tobirama remained Hashirama’s shadow as his brother in name, as their brothers in blood were sacrificed to the war machine, all traces of their childhood innocence going along with them. Hashirama’s associations and fascinations with the Uchiha heir were a growing problem, and Tobirama also felt the beginnings of what he later realized was jealousy, agreeing to spy on his brother for Butsuma.

The years stretched on in a series of endless battles and attempts at treaties and tenuous periods of peace. Boyhood fled, and inseparable, both Hashirama and Tobirama were no longer children but young men. When they were seventeen, Butsuma pushed to ensure that the needs of young men were met, sending them off to a bathhouse that catered to such needs.

It was at this bathhouse that Hashirama pulled Tobirama abruptly behind a partition in the dark of a secluded hallway and kissed him for the first time. Shock nearly made him shy away, but the sun-warm brightness of Hashirama’s chakra and the softness of his lips drew Tobirama into the heat of his embrace all the more. Still, the threat of being discovered forced him to think sensibly and he pulled away in spite of the growing intoxication and the heavy beating of his own heart.

“Don’t forget me?” Hashirama asked hurriedly before they were forced to part.

The thoughts of Hashirama’s kiss carried him through the awkward embarrassment of the remainder of that night, and when they reunited in the courtyard to travel home the next morning, their route home diverted into the woods for stolen moments of new discovery both exciting and frightening in their intensity. What he felt and what they shared might have been wrong in the eyes of others, but it was only because they didn’t know the truth, and they never would.

And Tobirama simply did not care. He was used to locking his emotions away, safe behind walls of steel where they could not be used against him.

Butsuma’s passing in battle was a blow to the clan at large, but he was granted an honorable death, and Hashirama assumed his place as clan head with more poise than anyone might have expected. Tobirama moved in his shadow, to no one’s surprise, tireless in his support and devotion. To those who witnessed them, all was as it should have been, brother supporting brother, although their household held its secrets. Behind those walls, though discreet, they were free for the first time in either of their lives. To live… and to love.

When the treaty between the clans was established, Tobirama remained in his place; like the veritable water upon the earth which fed the roots of the great tree that made up the village of his brother’s dreams. He was oddly content for the first time in his life, able to learn and seek his passions in this curious, anomalous peacetime. The Uchiha would always pose a threat, and Madara’s presence always left him unsettled, but the state of matters was secured for the time being.

That was, until further security matters required cementing loyalties with Uzushiogakure. The council insisted that the best way to accomplish such a feat was through the marriage of the Village leader to the eldest daughter of the headman of the island village. Their insistence hinged upon the fact that it would benefit everyone, especially as the Senju clan head was surely in need of an heir, or several. Thus, arrangements were made with due haste, and Uzumaki Mito was sent to Konoha with a full retinue to begin negotiations regarding her marriage to Hashirama.

The crushing weight behind Tobirama's ribs began that day and has not let up since.

Now Tobirama stands at his brothers back, watching Hashirama exchange vows with the red-haired foreigner, with the same impassive expression of a soldier holding a vigil. He can feel her sharp blue eyes scanning his form, weighing and measuring, and he knows she is no fool; he wonders what she is thinking when she gazes at him. He knows one thing: he does not trust the Uzumaki witch. Not yet.

The wedding feast passes far too quickly for his liking, and Hashirama’s good humor wears at his nerves. He longs for an escape, hating the noise and the crowd, and the charming face his brother shows his bride so easily. Even more so he hates what is yet to come.

Tobirama excuses himself to get some air for a few moments, walking furtively down a hallway to a meditation room and out onto the engawa. He rushes out the door and into the cold air outside where no one can see him fall apart for a brief moment. A few seconds, he tells himself, then no more.

Familiar, sun-bright chakra fills the space behind his eyelids, making all the fine hairs rise on the back of his neck, and in two beats Hashirama’s arms are around him, making him safe.

Making him despair.

“Anija, you can’t be here,” he chokes. “And you can’t do this.”

“I have moved the earth and water for you. I’d do anything for you and you know it.” Hashirama says fervently. “This is nothing.”

“Go back to your wife. This… it’s your wedding day.”

“I won’t forget you.”

“You have to today.” Tobirama near scoffs, wrenching himself free, though it seems to cut something within him to do so, leaving him bleeding inwardly.

Hashirama looks crestfallen, backing away as if from a wounded animal who might lash out and bite at any moment, and Tobirama can see the sheen of tears in his eyes. His brother always did have a hard time controlling his emotions.

He turns to face the snowy gardens until he can feel his brother’s chakra move back towards the dining hall. It is only then that he allows himself the moment of anger and grief that Hashirama interrupted. Then he puts on his courtly visage, and returns to his position as his brother’s shadow once more.

It is only an hour until he will be left to guard the bedchamber. It may break him, but no one else can be trusted to guard Hashirama as well as he can.

If Hashirama swears earth and water, then he’ll swear blood and bone.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed it! Please leave an ask or comment if you did - I would really love to hear from you <3
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr: [awintersrose.tumblr.com](http://awintersrose.tumblr.com)  
> Or Pillowfort: [www.pillowfort.io/awintersrose](http://www.pillowfort.io/awintersrose)


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